TL;DR
It is our attitude at the beginning of a test which, more than anything else, will determine its successful outcome.
Problem solving can be accomplished through a calm state of mind and a positive attitude.
Solving problems is a lot like solving puzzles, and having a calm state of mind is the key to unlocking the solution.
Relax. Take it easy. Then, the solution will reveal itself.
Whom am I speaking to? Who is this going to help?
The guy who quits in the face of adversity.
My Practical Experience
Helping my dad with computers
So my dad called me over, to help him with his computer issues.
Look, I might work a lot on computers, but when my dad asks me to fix one of his advice medical software things, I honestly hesitate at first instinct–how can I help?
At first, I simply listen to him complain, describing what was causing him stress. I listened, keeping my mouth shut, and then proposed one idea.
The first idea failed.
So I listen again, and this time my dad said something about needing to clear cookies.
“Cookies?”, I thought, “I know how to clear cookies, let’s try that.
So I cleared his browser cookies, and had him sign out of his web browser application. He then signed in again.
Not expecting it to work and getting ready to make my exit, I figured this would be my last attempt. But suddenly–it worked!
Holy shit! I was actually useful!
Teasing my brothers
A lot of times, people are unable to solve their own problems because they are too tensed and emotionally enraged.
But solving problems is a lot like solving puzzles, and having a calm state of mind is essential to unlocking the solution.
There are times when “forcing” a solution through brute force may work–but that should not be the habit you wish to develop.
I joke with my siblings. Since they are so young, they get easily frustrated, and end up making things worse. That’s when I come in. I come in with a good, positive, relaxed attitude, and I tell them,
“If you ask nicely, then maybe you win the video game”
Obviously, the request of asking a game to let you win does not work, but the statement does two things for my brothers:
- Relaxes them through silliness
- It’s hard to both laugh and be angry at the same time
- Uplifts their mood
- When they are in a more pleasant state of mind, they are more open to trying again, but this time in a relaxed fashion
Jordan Peterson’s Verdict
Full link here.
“The thing that tends to turn people against life is the fact that life if full of inexplicable tragedies. I would say that if you could develop a motive, an attitude towards the world that’s characterized by increase in the ability to bear its tragic circumstances, that that’s evidence that your attitude is correct.
Now the only person that’s going to be able to determine that is you, because it’s not going to be evident necessarily to people around you, and it may not play out the way you would want to in the external world.
How is it that you can come to the state where you can trust your own judgement about your belief? Well that ties back into this. If you fill up your head with information that you know, by your own definitions of truth, to be false, then you can ensure that you’re not going to be able to trust your own judgement.
Now the problem is that there are going to be times in your life where your judgement is the only judgement that can even possibly be valid, and it better be the case that where you’re in that circumstance, that your head is free enough of lies, so that you can be certain that the decision you’re making is right”
Thanks for the advice, now how can I practically put this to use in a simple way for daily execution?
Two main lessons.
First, when people have issues, the least you can do is listen, and then try something. People will respect you for even trying. It’s in not trying where people feel like their issues are not respected. To respect someone means at least attempting something, independent if you pass or fail.
Second, have the right attitude when trying to problem solve. I don’t know if I would have kept trying if my attempt with clearing the cookies failed, but if I had written off the idea of “that’s not going to work” so early, my dad would still be tinkering with the issue.
What made it easy to keep going? Telling myself, “Hey, I know how to clear cookies, and it does not cost my anything to give it a try, why not go for it?”.
Ultiamtely, problem solving can be accomplished through a calm state of mind and a postive attitude.